Number of times the home health nurse had to stick me to get blood since she can’t draw off my PICC: 3 (I’m an easy stick.)
Numbers of times she had to lumber out to her car to get something she’d forgotten: 2
Number of times she contaminated the sterile field changing my dressing: 2
Number of times I had to reach over and clamp my PICC myself to keep her from injecting an extension set full of air into my central line: 1
Number of times she said, “Well, that was stupid of me, wasn’t it?”: 4
That’s it. I’m going to train my dogs to draw blood and change my central line dressing. Even with no opposable thumbs I think they’ll do a better job.