Orlando with Xanax Instead of Mickey

I swore I wasn’t going to blog anymore this week because I’m trying to get it together to leave Friday for Bloggy Boot Camp on Saturday in Baltimore. But I just had to link up to Mama Kat’s Writers’ Workshop this week because 1.) I’M GOING TO MEET HER! Yes, she’s speaking in Baltimore and although I’m going to try really hard to not squeal and jump up and down like a tween at a Miley Cyrus concert I’m not making any promises – it could get ugly. And 2.) I’ve been thinking all week about my trip to Orlando in October 2004. That was the last time I flew anywhere. My husband loves to drive, so if we go anywhere he drives – no biggie. But when I went to Orlando it was the first time I’d flown since our honeymoon eighteen years earlier AND I was traveling alone AND I was going for the purpose of taking a REALLY important, REALLY difficult test for a professional certification. I’d been studying and training during every spare moment for three months. I made all the travel arrangements, booked the flight, hotel, and rental car (I’d never done any of that before) and, with a few Xanax thoughtfully provided by a friend (WAY illegal) I hopped on the plane. By the time I was in the rental car on the way to the hotel I’d had two Xanax and made several interesting discoveries. It turns out that while I’d had my nose buried in study guides a hurricane had done a lot of damage in Orlando, and you know what are the first things to blow away in high winds? Street signs. There were NO FREAKIN’ STREET SIGNS. This, of course, made navigation a tad more challenging. I called my husband to have him “talk me down” and soon discovered that the Winter clothes I had laid out for the boys (it was starting to get cold back home in Kentucky) had been accidentally put out for the Goodwill pickup. Fabulous. I found the hotel and checked in, then lit out to find the building I needed on the University of Central Florida campus. Everyone I asked pointed me in a different direction. I finally gave up and found a restaurant near the hotel for dinner – a restaurant that served WINE! Long story short, it all ended up OK in the end. I hooked up with other lost folks the next morning and we found the mystery building on the beautiful UCF campus (even after a hurricane!) and our instructor for the training session before the exam was a gorgeous twenty-something Exercise Physiology grad student with a British accent, longish curly dark hair, big dark eyes, and zero body fat. Yes, I will admit to some courgar-ish fantasies during the more boring parts of the training! The exam was as difficult and stressful as I’d expected, but a few weeks later I was notified I’d passed by a healthy margin – WOO HOO!

I’m not planning on driving in Baltimore this weekend, and I’m not expecting any exams (although I’ve been studying up on Twitter a bit), so I think I can do without the illegal Xanax this time. All I need are cute shoes and the promise of some adult beverages somewhere along the line (but if someone has a spare hunky EP grad student hanging around schlep him along, ‘kay?)
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8 thoughts on “Orlando with Xanax Instead of Mickey”

  1. Safe travels! I can guarantee there will be some adult beverages and lots of fun this weekend.

    Looking forward to meeting you!

  2. Driving in Baltimore can get scary quickly. Before you know it you're in front of a crack house with a dirty cop and a goat. Okay, maybe not a goat, but still, spoo-ky! See you Saturday, I'll be the one with the junk in the trunk:)

  3. okay, i'm a little jealous about your attending the bloggy boot camp.

    the clothes got put out for goodwill??!! that would totally happen to me.

  4. Stopping by from Mama Kat's…driving in a new city with no street signs…yikes! I don't like flying at all…but never tried it with Xanax!
    Have fun at bloggy bootcamp.


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