I can’t lie. If someone asks me a direct question . . . I simply can’t. I’ll give it away with the look on my face, a long pause, and probably other ways I don’t even realize. Thankfully, I’ve spent my entire career as a nurse so I can turn a phrase. I can change “obese” to “well-fed” as easily as I have changed “kicked me HARD in the belly while I was pregnant” to “a bit disoriented at times” when talking to family members.
This also means I can almost always tell when someone lies to me face-to-face. Many times I can even tell over the phone if I’ve spent enough time around the person. There’s a sociopath I’ve known for decades who has so many tells he should never play poker!
I don’t get out much. In fact, my social calendar is about 95% medical visits and therapies. But I can tell you without a doubt my primary care physician smiles widely when he lies. And another of my docs is either a pathological liar or truly doesn’t give a shit about any of his patients. Hard to say. Also hard to find another doc in his specialty nearby so I don’t have to drive so far and pay to be lied to.
But if you’re a human lie-detector you can’t advertise the fact. It makes people nervous. And letting people know what their ‘tells’ are is an incredibly bad idea. There’s most likely someone else in their life that also knows how to tell when that person is lying – someone to whom it’s much more important. So just keep mum.
I only interact with my bestest friends and my close family. And those are the people who’d only lie to me for good reasons. Example of good reason: “My hands go numb when I reach over my head. Does my hair look OK?” Answering “Looks fine!” is perfect even if I know it’s a big ‘ole lie. Why? Because that same person would immediately help me tame my crazy hair into something that didn’t scare small children if necessary – without saying a word. #blessedwithgoodfriends