Three weeks ago today I had surgery. If all had gone according to plan I would be at the halfway point of my post-op recovery period. Since “according to plan” hasn’t come close to describing my life lately I’m preparing for another try at surgery in a little over a week, and I’ve essentially been on house arrest for three weeks, tethered to a bag of IV antibiotics for seven hours out of the day and feeling like I have the flu. Ever had the flu for three weeks? Whatever microscopic bits of “sweet” and “perky” were left of my original personality after this two-year ordeal are now gone.
It’s been a learning experience, though. Here are the things I’ve learned about myself over the last three weeks:
1.) I will never be able to consistently operate any device hooked to any TV. I’m home alone all day. One would think I could figure out how to play a DVD on the TV in the bedroom, or how to watch a Netflix movie through the XBox in the living room. I even had my twelve-year-old write out instructions for me. I still can’t do it. I can turn on the TV and I can change channels. That brings us to . . .
2.) Reality TV is beneficial. I thought I worked with crazy people, but when I go back to work I will pause daily to appreciate how pleasant and reasonable are the people I used to refer to as “asshats” and “batshit crazy”. What am I watching? Real Housewives of Orange County (New Jersey starts next week and I am so excited), Pregnant in Heels, and Mob Wives. I don’t care how much editing was done: Tamra, Vicki, Drita, Renee, and all of Rosie’s clients are cray-cray.
3.) Twitter is even more awesome than I previously thought. Y’all know I loved Twitter already, but it is a lifesaver when you’re feeling bored and isolated. The other night I was staying up late to do a specially timed antibiotic infusion in preparation for morning labs (which, of course, my idiot home health nurse screwed up). All the reality shows on were repeats, and I only like to watch the same train wreck once, so I pulled up Twitter and chatted for a while with one friend who was working the night shift and another on the West Coast who was wondering what the hell I was doing up in the middle of the night.
4.) Big-dog antibiotics are horrific. I’ve always been extremely healthy (recent neck pain / neurosurgery ordeal excepted) so I had never been on Levaquin before. And I’d certainly never had IV Vancomycin. They seem to be part of the “cure you or kill you” school of medicine. So, if anyone you know is ever on either of these meds, especially IV, and especially for an extended period of time, please be sweet to them. Be understanding when they are mean and nasty, because let me tell you, they are miserable.
5.) My friends and family rock. They keep me informed and entertained through texts, tweets, phone calls, cards, and emails. They bring me and send me food, books, games, and surprises. They’ve offered to come stay with me, they’ve listened to my rants, and they’ve understood my silences. When I whine about being bored they find me tasks to keep me occupied and new blogs to read. Of course I already knew my friends and family rocked, but something like this just really brings it all home. Love you guys!